I Want My Mommy

My old man cat, he’s almost 15, I’ve started noticing similar symptoms in him to what one of my previous old lady cats had. Most likely hyperthyroidism, meds and treatment might get me another year or so with him, but basically there’s a countdown now. On his bad days all he wants to do is curl up on me and sleep. I guess that even when they’re not human children, when they don’t feel well, they still just want their mom.

Meanwhile, coming to terms with another impending loss is something I don’t even want to contemplate.

I’ve actually been doing really well, emotionally, lately. Finally working through years of repressed grief and trauma had allowed me to reconnect with myself, and merge the optimistic person I used to be with the desensitized person I’d become. I hope that watching another beloved pet shut down in front of my eyes doesn’t derail my progress. It’s exhausting being sad all the time.


15 thoughts on “I Want My Mommy

  1. It and I understand, for reasons I won’t go into I don’t get to see my grandchildren . They are close and I would love to see them. This state of affairs has gone on for three years. If anything happened to our dog I don’t know how we’d cope . Yes trying to be happy, pretending all the time is hard, and so tiring. I am sending you hope, love and sympathy from one who understands.πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ

  2. Sadness is insanely exhausting!!! And there are no easy answers. But I do know from experience that we can’t hide from grief… we either deal with it honestly, or it eats us up from inside. So keep working through the past and (in theory) the next loss will be easier when the day arrives, because it won’t be sitting on top of a pre-existing mountain of bottled-up grief. Sending prayers for strength and comfort, jen

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