I wake up feeling fine. I get ready for work, drive in and as I step into the building I can feel it begin. The tickle in the back of my throat, a sneeze threatening to tear through me, the congestion begins as the urge to cough overtakes me. By the time 10am rolls around I can barely stand to still be in the building. It has been so bad lately that I have been working 3/4 days from home nearly every day of the week and I know it is taking a toll on my productivity to not have the resources at home that I have at the office. On the off-chance that my congestion was due to some impending sinus infection I stopped by the clinic on my way home from the office this morning. Surprise, surprise, no infection. I am, however, suffering from an allergic reaction to airborne particles. Considering I feel much better outside the office building, fine in my car, fine at home, the conclusion is that I am reacting to something in the air specifically at the office building. I am not alone. Many other people have noticed and complained about respiratory and nasal issues when they are at work, people who (like me) have no dust or seasonal allergies. Numerous people have requested an air quality test and we have all been ignored. I wonder how many people have to be ill for the owners of the building to take some responsibility and do something. How many other office buildings have similar issues? I shouldn’t have to be on a variety of pills, sprays and steroids just to breathe inside a specific building because the company doesn’t care about their employee’s health.
Where I work the reality I perceive is one where talent is discouraged or underutilized and being productive is seen as an insult to others. You can literally be the most productive and accurate member of a team, known for learning things quickly and excellent at problem solving. You can be the go-to person when the rest of the team has questions and the one they rely on to fix all the little errors that happen. You can then apply for a position on the team of which the description is to be the go-to person for questions and relied upon to learn quickly and then assist others in new processes and be told you interviewed extremely well, impressed the hell out of them but that they decided to go with another team member better suited for the position. Seriously? Once again they want to use my ability but not reward me for it or even publicly recognize all that I do. As they provided no feedback on why they thought the rest of the team wouldn’t want to officially come to me with all their process questions I can only perceive that the actual reason I wasn’t selected was that they either didn’t want to have to pay me additional money for things I already fucking do or they were afraid that if they trained me on their own duties that I would do their job better than they do and they didn’t want to jeopardize their future job security by allowing me the opportunity to show them up. Either way they didn’t make smart choices for their “promotions” and once again the reward went to people who are constantly fucking up and causing re-work for others (me mostly) and have no ability to retain simple information and process steps. I do not understand this mentality. I see it not just in my company but in all the ones I’ve worked for. Not just concerning me but in all the departments across the board. Hard work is not recognized positively or appreciated. Taking an initiative is seen as a threat. Anyone who is good at their job is to be repressed so they don’t make others look bad for not being as talented or dedicated. So many insecure people run things nowadays and they waste resources because of their unneccessary fear. It makes me sad and angry. This is why I never agreed to skip ahead grades when I was younger. They wanted to take me out of first grade and put me in third grade after I took the IQ tests but I argued with my parents against it because I knew even then that I would have to deal with asshole children older than me who felt threatened that I was sitting next to them in school. I am sick and tired of letting other people’s limited vision repress me. It was worse this time because they actually admitted to me that they knew I was more than capable of handling the position, that I performed flawlessly in the interview. They specifically chose not to utilize my abilities for their own selfish reasons. The whole reason I succeeded whenever I was a manager was because I would evaluate the strengths and weaknesses of my team members and position them accordingly whether I liked them or not. You don’t have to like someone to recognize their value to you. These people don’t even realize that they are making their own job harder in the future simply to keep me held down. The reality is that these people are insecure and insignificant and have set themselves up to fail and I don’t think I want to stick around to watch.